Keep your enemies closer?
I admit it. I’m addicted. Facebook is the first thing I check in the morning before I get started on my day, and the last thing I check before I go to bed. I use it to keep in touch with friends who live on the east coast, family who I don’t get to see on a regular basis or as a part of my clients’ social media strategies. I also make contact with the occasional work colleague - although I prefer they reach out to me on linked in.
I feel like my friend list is a culled work of art reflecting different people from different parts of my life and my status updates are like my inner monologue – in other words they’re pretty personal. I’m among friends aren’t I?
Lately I’ve been getting a lot of friend requests from “friends” of business colleagues trying to “network” their way onto my page so they can get to know me and sell me something. With a couple of very rare exceptions, unless I meet you - and remember you - in person, I decline the invitation.
But then there are also, those two.
Two women who came into my life by way of a third, who I long ago ejected from my company and my FB friend list because she is in a word – evil. These two were acquaintances of hers who I had socialized with occasionally and who I discovered – not surprisingly - had made me the subject of their idle gossip, reveling in schadenfreude whenever I had a bad day.
Most of my paranoia was remedied by a simple adjustment of my privacy settings but every now and again in the friend list, I see them smiling, reminding me of the one I can't stand and who I naively trusted. We have other mutual friends, which is why I don't unlist them right away but for some reason now, I feel like I'm being a coward. Why can't I let them go?
The expression Keep your friends close and your enemies closer, was first attributed to Chinese military strategist Sun Tzu. Too bad he isn’t around to write The Art of Facebook. Some people think that enemies brought closer can become friends. Enemies, they say, are probably more like you than you think and if you bring them closer, you’ll see they mean well. Others say keeping an enemy in close proximity means you can prevent an unexpected strike because the toughest and most destructive blows come when unexpected.
Waiting for someone to attack me seems pretty exhausting. Besides when I don’t see them, I don’t think of them and my life rolls along quite merrily.
Marianne Williamson writes, “For every person who might reject you if you live your truth, there are ten others who will embrace you and welcome you home.”
What do you think, should I get rid of these two to make room for two new? Or is it important to “save face” with our mutual friends for the sake of people who don’t really give a damn about me in the first place?